So, this Idea of simplicity... I have been struggling with it lately. My journey on the road to living simply is rather new, to say the least. I have always been a girl who loves new clothes, make-up, and nice things in general, lol. I wasn’t concerned with being frugal or green for that matter. My journey came another way, via my love and passion for natural parenting.
It all started with my desire for a natural birth. Then in hopes of saving money I decided to cloth diaper my youngest son. It started so innocently, wanting to save some money. To be honest with you, I never thought about the waste factor of the diapers, just that they were cheaper and less chemicals on my baby. Well to make a long story short, fast forward a year and here I am. I now long to have a chemical, plastic free house, cooked from scratch food on the table, hand knitted longies, homemade baby soap and diaper solution, and to not care about having the latest clothes or toys for my boys. I want to be able to sew their clothes and me long skirts. What has happened to me I ask myself? My husband keeps saying he fully expects to come home and find me out in the yard hugging a tree.
I mean I was in pageants! My make-up, hair and clothes had to be perfect. Things really mattered to me. Now I find myself finding great joy and peace in hanging diapers out on the line on a beautiful breezy day. I choose not to work and forgo many material possessions to stay at home with my boys. When I used to ask other women what they always wanted to do and they would respond with being a mom I just didn’t get it. I thought you had to have a career or something! Now I totally get it. Although I’m a great social worker I long to be at home cooking, sewing, home schooling and finding ways to live more simple.
When I look at (OK, more like compare) myself to other “natural” mommas. The ones who make everything homemade and seem to not care about things, rather enjoying the simple things in life I have to wonder how committed I really am to a simple life?
I will admit I want a new bigger house and I so so long to go on a vacation. It is hard to see everyone on their new boats going to the lake. Pictures of friends on white sand beaches wishing I could take my kids and experience that with them.
But as I lay there nursing my little one to sleep tonight and I started to get ancy to get up and unwind and watch a little T.V. I stopped for a second. I thought to myself, I wouldn’t trade this for the world. I wouldn’t give up one moment of this angel delighting in my nourishment, one crazy unorganized failed day that ended in tears and tantrums. I wouldn’t trade who I have become.
If not for my kids and something as simple as cloth diapering, maybe I would still be obsessed with the things of this world as well. Some may never understand or have the delight to know what living simply truly means. But I feel so blessed that my eyes have been opened. Yes, there will probably always be a part of me that wants for certain things. But my heart has discovered what truly matters and I have discovered joy in things I would have never know would it not have been for this thing called…… simplicity.
Candace
